SJP #64 Ruth Schwenk: How to Give Ourselves Grace in Our Motherhood

faith home + family parenting podcast Jun 29, 2018
SJP Episode #064 with Ruth Schwenk How to Give Ourselves Grace in Our Motherhood

Simply Joyful Podcast — Ruth Schwenk: How to Give Ourselves Grace in Our Motherhood

Today on the podcast I talk with Ruth Schwenk about how motherhood can often feel like a comparison game. Not only do we sometimes feel judged by others, but often times we are the ones analyzing our own job as a mom. Are we matching up with what other people seem to be doing well? Are we living up to our expectations for ourselves as moms? We all have this picture in our head of what a good mom looks like. Sometimes it feels unattainable. However, that’s what is so beautiful about Ruth Schwenk’s new book, The Better Mom. She helps us to remember that it’s not about perfection, it’s about growing in grace in our motherhood.

I have been one of the contributors over at Ruth’s blog, The Better Mom, for about a year now. As I mention in this episode, it was one of my goals when I first started blogging to write for her site. Just an incredible group of ladies writing over there. It’s been fun to be associated with them.  

I just know you are going to love this episode with Ruth. She is such an encourager and gets very vulnerable at the end of this show about some health issues facing her family. So, I hope you’ll join me in praying for her family. I love our community of listeners.

Here's our conversation, get ready to be encouraged! 


Highlights from the Show:

  • Ruth got her start in writing books through her website, The Better Mom. Ruth has four kids ranging in ages sixteen to nine. She’s been married to her husband for twenty years and they’ve been in ministry for over fifteen years! Wow!
  • When Ruth started The Better Mom, she wanted to set it up as a contributor blog. I’ve had the honor of being a contributor for almost a year now and it’s been so much fun! Ruth shares a little bit about the inspiration and vision of this amazing resource for moms.
  • One of my favorite marriage books of all time is Sacred Marriage. I love the subtitle of this book — “what if marriage was to make you more holy not happy” — which is so true about motherhood as well! I love how Ruth talks about this in her new book about motherhood. Motherhood is about more than just these dreams that we have of the picture of what motherhood will be.  Much of the time God uses motherhood to shape our hearts. 
  • Ruth opens the book with such a funny story. It involves a child’s friend asking Ruth if she really thought she was “the better mom.” I asked Ruth what the inspiration was behind not only the blog’s title but also her new book. 
  • I really love all the chapter titles in Ruth’s book because she really touches on the emotions that we feel as mothers. One of the chapters that really stood out to me was the chapter that talks about the feeling that motherhood has robbed you of something — which I think this is something common with moms. Ruth shares some encouragement for moms who are feeling this loss in life and how to find the balance between “me” time and motherhood.
  • Ruth and I chat about how fast our time with our kids has gone. Putting it in perspective, they will be adults a lot longer than they will be children under our roof! This is the time that we need to slow down, listen, and be present in our kids’ lives!
  • We chat about our mom expectations — you know, how we are all the perfect mothers BEFORE we have kids! Ha! Reality often shatters that dream and picture we have of being a “perfect” mom. I loved how Ruth covers even this in her book! Ruth gives some advice on how moms can let go of those expectations. 
  • One of the biggest purposes of The Better Mom was to create a community — both online and in real life. That fellowship is so important for moms. I asked Ruth to share her advice on how moms can seek out friendships and cultivate relationships.
  • Ruth and I chatted a little bit about the two spectrums of motherhood that society projects — either you’re the “Joanna Gaines/Martha Stewart” mom or you’re the  “Bad Mom”. I asked Ruth to give listeners some advice on how we can stop idolizing perfectionism without having to take on the “bad mom” persona.
  • Ruth’s husband, Patrick, has recently had some health issues. I asked Ruth if she could update us on what is going on and for some ways that we can be in prayer for him and their family. I also give a quick update on my friend Kim (from episode 42) who is in a battle for her life with a rare lung disease.

Resources mentioned:

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